Merping, Mating, and Money[spent at Target]

So I get that like half the population of bloggers don't like reading or care to read about peoples oodles of fun from their weekend shenans. Like are you the weekend grinch? No offense. But when I have a boring weekend, I totes live vicariously through my bloggie friends. Just saying. 

Would you hate me if I told you my weekend started Thursday night? It was my friend from one of my classes 23rd birthday so we pong'ed it up. I feel like every time I pong, I learn new ways to play and I feel like an idiot. Seriously, I sweaaaaar I've played before. Pretty sure I put on for my team that night and made it in all the cups until the last two. WE WON. Woman Powaaaaa.

(I know call me Queen B of pong photog. Hire me!)

Friday [The Merping]: Since it is the second to last weekend at school, we went a little too hard. Mall trip (and got precious phone cases), fro-yo date (#tbt to what I did friday nights in high school, mostly.), and vodka wine shots. Obviously thats some classy stuff. I was ready to get my merp-ing on. Wonder what it is? Not even sure how the funtastic term started but ever seen Jersey Shore? It's basically just Snooks and Deena going hamtastic on the dance floor. And heck, that is what I did. Well, we did. The Snooki to my Deana. Whenever were together, it's guaranteed a great time. A friendship is 100% the best when you are totally content with going out just you two and having your own fun. And we were the life of the frat party. So maybe we suck and we're rebellious and didn't follow the 'highlighter' themed party, but we sure as hell made up for it. Girls were pointing, guys were laughing but hey we had a freakin' blast.

We go hard. Told ya.

Saturday [The Mating]: I saw Hoodie Allen and D-WHY...also known as my future husband in real life. Best advice I could give you: constantly tweet at your favorite celeb. I did, and look where it got me.

He was on first, and I'm pretty sure I was one of the only loons screaming for him and singing along. I'm that betch that is happy he isn't popular so girls stay away from him. I walked up to him after his performance and said, "Hey I wanted to introduce myself....I'm Rachel I tweet at you all the time and you're my phone background" Boom. He laughed and said he knew exactly who I was. He told me he liked the flowers in my hair (see here), as well as how his sisters name is Rachel. Alright shut up and kiss me -- whens the wedding David? I decided to go back a second time because we're dating, it's fine. I gave stink eyes to the girls screaming about how they loved him. No, sorry. You seriously can not. Thanks. I walked up to him and he held me in his arms. Freakin' swooning. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't drooling. I told him we needed a picture of him kissing me on the cheek. Take that ladies that are trying to steal my man. Let's just say as far as the concert goes, I hate 99.99% of my generation. And by that I mean how do parents let their 16 year old kids wear crop tops and shorts in 30 degree weather to let them get super drunk and thrown out of a concert. You know you are an old person when you'd rather stand in the back instead of a mosh pit. 

Sunday [The Money(Spent at Target)]:

I guess my brain just had ESPN or something... with every other freaking blogger in the land of blog. I headed my booty over to Target to spend a buttload of money. No bueno. I bought cute stuff which is just absolutely fabulous, but I'm sure I'll regret it later. Hello to my new boots, leggings, plaid shirts, and fun makeup shenans. Welcome to the club. and by club I mean my closet. I also stink and didn't get a chance to take an artsy picture while there and insta it like every other blogger. So maybe I stink. 

This post is exactly how my weekend felt: LONG. 

Matches made in Hell.

For those of you who don't know me and are hopping on over today for the first time, Hi! What a glorious day for you to come join up in my little fort corner thing of the interweb.

*MAKE SURE TO LIKE MY NEW FACEBOOK PAGE! SO EXCITING I KNOW!*

I am guy crazy. I guess I seem crazy in general, but literally who isn't these days? #Trendyproblems
Like my blog besties, we spend our time in group texts, and every day breathing which includes various activities. When we are not doing this,  or sleeping, we tind it up. We spend group chats talking about how weird guys are, or when they dress up like Thor in their pictures, judging them based on their taglines, and sharing our weird personal conversations we take on.
Yup. It's exactly why we get along so well.

Even before finding a group of ladies who share the same love bored satisfaction of finding duders we would have never met otherwise, I took the meaning of swiping left/swiping right into my own hands.

If you are human, you most likely have a type of guy that you would basically drool like a baby over. I mean I do. and It's one that isn't going away anytime soon. I'm fine with that, don't you worry.

The worst part about tinder is that sometimes it gets BORING: no good guys/you're just wasting time on there because you have nothing else to do so you find yourself liking random guys you would never "suck face" (don't you hate when people use that term. I DO) with. Sometimes, I win at my own game. I also do not message first. So here we go, my matched dudes stereotyped:

NJB Noah: Yep, fully aware his name is Andrew. But so my type. NYU? Smart/trendy. AEPI? Even better. This jewish girl knows her jewish frats when she sees one. He's a potential dude, being twenty, and a Dave lover. He has some asian writing too? Wow, Andrew...Andy...Drew...how cultured of you ;)

Alright fabulous we can get married and he can hire dave to play "Crash Into Me" in the background as he gets on his knees in his blue Vineyard Vines pastel shorts and a nice sassy Ralph Lauren striped button down. We even have mutual friends?! Well damn, invite them to the wedding!

I'm not getting too far ahead of myself right?

Also: NJB? Nice Jewish Boy. Aka what I need to find myself. So if you know of any, please, send them on over. I swear I'm the perfect nice little jewish girl, too.

Blunt Billy: LIKE NO. Although yes, you are probably of middle east decent (damn you, dark skinned/dark haired freaks..), I wasn't too scared. Chances are you could have been Israel? I would have appreciated it. I'm jewish for gd sake. But you threw me a freaking fast curve ball. By you saying your not a terrorist is this some associative math property BS that makes you actually a terrorist.

What business does a terrorist have on a creepy site where you can find people near you (sort of) to prey on.......you know.....?!?

Stalker Steve: this doesn't even need explaining. He just set himself up for his own episode of Date Line. Or Maury. Or probably Dr. Phil considering he sent some pretty creepy shit. Let's break it down. Not in a dance move fashion.
Beautiful Broad? Beautiful I can take *blushes*. Broad? Um. Thats a new one thanks. Sort of creepy and threatening.

Taped my phone to my face? Well thats uncomfortable
FOR TWO DAYS? Do you not have other friends?
Sitting outside my apartment? Well damn, you're life sucks.
Reception in the parking lot? Are you sure this isn't code for you doing some drugs or something...
Playing games with your heart? I mean I haven't answered since you got really creepy so jokes on you for getting creepy.

CYA.

Hungry Harry: Well damn. I already assigned someone to butter my muffin. So Marc, get in line.

You can go shave your back now.
#MeanGirlsQuotes

Quoting She's the Man? Myyyyy dude.

Want to giggle with real life experiences tinder brought into my life?
My first real life date with a dude from tinder. To be honest, I was worried I would become another lifetime movie story. It was the greatest date ever.
Then the second date rolled around and we realized we had nothing in common and he became the lord of douchebaggary. I also showed him a bit of the blog world. WHAT WAS I THINKING.
This guy? Complete rando and I stopped it before it got worse. You belong in the kitchen, douche canoe. Sexist loser.

Share with me and my gal pals your disasters. I wonder if it could top ours.
(Rachael & Melissa)

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You've got mail! [A linkup]

Now, I am no statistics researcher. or Math professor. Or smart person. But I'm going to guess that about 86% of you are taken. The other 14% are girls that rep that single girl swag.

Why are you single? Kidding. I don't want to know because we all know you don't want to know why I am. Shout out to my ex for being SO awesome and breaking my heart. *Insert sarcasm here*

Since I've been a single Sally for the past three months, I've had my fair share of online dating. I mean really if you look at my freaking twitter, half my tweets are about how much I love tinder. Heck if you search tinder or online dating or guys stink eff you on my blog, you'll find a lot of information that you actually would ever want to.

After chatting with the fabbyfab lady named Rachael at Pretty in Pink, we decided after everything we've been through with online dating we might as well make a damn linkup. The 14% single ladies of the world must feel like same way. Also Melissa agreed, hence a baby linkup was birthed.

Not single? Join the link-up too..if you have an online dating disaster story worth while!

Need some fuel for the fire of a link up you are going to join? Look no freakin' further. I sometimes think I'm Queen B of online dating disasters. 

Tall Tim Part 1//Tall Tim Part 2//Creepy NoName-r//Ex bofo Billy

Come join in on all the fun this thursday. Really do it. Let your mind go wild and bash all those random creepos who don't read your blog. #Amen. 

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I'm a mouse, duh

Who doesn't love the cliche halloween outfits in high school/college?
All Hallows eve is a week away people! Start planning ;)
Especially if you are in college. Halloween is on a thursday. You are welcome.
3 nights? 3 outfits? Lets do this.

While some of us don't like the super reveling outfits and like to do something fun while still looking like a hot commodity, check out some of my recommendations and side comments that may or may not dis certain outfits. 

1. Sandy (Grease)

So maybe you don't have your Danny Zuko to be your bad man thunderbird dude, but hey if you check out that frat party thursday night, you could be his pink lady! You don't need to spend a bajillion dolla dolla bills ya'll to be this bamf of a lady. Have an american apparel leotard? Or even one from dancing? Top complete. Find some leather leggings, or even regular ones (I bought some at pacsun!), and there is your sassy fittin' pants. Red pumps. Any. Jackets optional because we all know how sweaty frat houses are. Optional: Red Lipstick, hoop earrings, and some curls. Don't have blonde hair? Dont worry. Transformation Thursday the ish out of Sandra Dee.

Fun fact: I'm potentially trying out this outfit this halloween, make sure to check out my halloween outfit on the blog!

2. Pageant princess

This is Hannah Brewer, Miss MD teen USA 2013. This is probably the easiest outfit you could ever come up with. Find a sassy dress, pumps, look super fly, and get a crown and sash. I was Miss USA a few years ago (since I love pageants. See here), and people thought it fit me so well.

NOTE: If you are going to wear a "toddlers and tiara's outfit", please do not converse with me. I think these outfits are a disgrace. Slash....why would ya want to walk around with a pacifier? Ain't nobody got time for that.

How patriotic am I?

3. Walk of Shame

How fitting for you college ladies. No I'm not calling you out. Ummm are you guilty or something? Kidding!!!!! We've at least witnessed this at one point or another on our college campuses. You can either just wear a large shirt and hair up/messy, as well as your make up or go with the I had a slumber party with a manly man who wheres hot button downs aka oh wait he's only a frat-star. You know what I'm saying. Borrow a friends big buttondown shirt, wear short/short-skirt/spandex, and heels. Ya know the look I'm talking about ;) Heck, I even did it in my junior year of high school. Recipe for humiliation and disaster. 

I hope I gave you some solid inspiration and hope for your potential outfits this 31st of october. If not, I hope I graced your presence with my weird-ness and made you realize what you don't want to be for halloween. Want to be a provocative bumble-bee, cat, or mouse? You do you, Glenn Coco.

the freakin weekend: Weekend Shenans (+GIVEAWAY)

Remember how I told you I was generally excited psyched for this weekend? Well, it was pretty awesome. Aside the 6 hours spent in a car on friday. (read: 3 to get home from school. an hour home. 3 hours driving to friends. yahoo)

After DEVOURING YUMMY CHIPOTLE...the night began. I will spare you my little "under 21 getting into a bar" fun details, but if it gave you any flashbacks to you being in college...ya know how it is ;)

Ya know how I told you one of my good friends and I look like twins? Well some random old guy (typical, I guess) came up to US asking if we were twins. We, being silly girls who looked younger than half the population at this bar, said yes. He then proceeded to ask us if our names were weird twin names like Sarah and Sar-ah. LITERALLY WHAT TWINS DO YOU KNOW, DUDE? Regardless, them fireball shots got me feelin' like Whit.

Also, reuniting with a friend you haven't seen in a year+? So great. She still had me cracking up always and it was SO fun to talk about memories from our trip/ life in high school. Best part? We had identical matching black peplum shirts packed and we didn't even plan it. #ItslikeESPNorSomething...

Saturday, despite the icky weather, we headed to Baltimore Inner-harbor. I was freakin' out that it was so close. I love adventuring. And I love the feeling of being on vacay. Then again, who doesn't? Right.
Can we also talk about how Urban was having a 50% EVERYTHING sale? I bought a cute pair of shorts for ONLY 10 doll-hairs. Seriously, what is life!

Too bad friday night drinks on drinks on drinks got the best of us and caused us to do nothing but bake cookies on saturday night. I am beyond grateful for friends I can go forever without seeing and act as if a day hasn't gone by.

Coolest part of my weekend? Ya know you are a blogger when you see this...and freak out because you know someone with this blog title. Shout out to Kelli!

Happiest I've been in months

Okay so maybe I'm just really happy because I got great news tonight, and drank some wine, or just had a great night with friends and decided to "buzz"-ily, write this post at 1AM. Leggo.

You know how I told you I was so stressed? Now that I made my life simple, I am stress free.
I seriously have too much time to focus on netflix, but I mean, I won't complain too much.

Last weekend I went home, and took a trip to my old school. My 2 hour trip turned into about 3 and a half. SO many people to catch up with, but that day I knew I was generically happy. My baby (car), actually got it's second paid for car wash for his two year old birthday. Yep, I celebrated.

I also enjoyed the little things in life this week:

The sunsets, the long drives to think, the new clothes, the arts, my new fave watch from target, and friendships.

I also just realized I posted the guitar picture twice. But hey, it was a great start to the week so guitars, keep doing you. Thanks for bringing excitement to my monday nights of netflix.

I even had a chance to throw on a scrunchie (well, because yolo) and a big sweat shirt. I called it my "am I 5 years old or a new character on Saved by the Bell" look. I'm fine with the second one as long as we can find me my own A.C slater. Yum. #ManCrushMonday

Last night? Rain obvi only calls for wine and netflix. FINALLY catching up on Desperate Housewives about 5 years later. #TeamTomScavo. Later, my closest friends got done their events for the night and we all kicked back, relaxed, and quoted Mean Girls endlessly like it was our job. We even found a youtube vid with the greatest quotes. Four for you Glenn Coco. AND NONE FOR GRETCHEN WEINERS BYE. 

I can't help it, I get excited when Mean Girls is brought up.

My awkward "I'm excited to be alive" face is pasted up on the far right for all y'all to judge see.

Today is my fall break and I am more excited than a child gets when they color outside the lines. Or when a dog see's another pretty dog. You know what I mean....

I get to see my friend from my one travel trip that I haven't seen since May 2012, as well as my "twin". I mean no we aren't related but we've been told for years now that we look almost identical when we smile. It's the asian squinty eyes, ya heard.

Here's to never growing up. And backin' that azz up with Whit.

These are my confessions

Here goes nothin'.

...I let my stress get too much into my head and effect my life choices.

...On the other hand I love doing nothing and having me time. 

...I paint my nails at least ONCE every 4 days. Wish I was kidding.

...I want to start using the term "Douche Canoe"-Shout out to Whitney

...I've been eating like crapola since being at school. and work outs have gone to an ultimate minimum.

...I don't know if I'm actually happy here and it scares me to death.

...talking to a therapist helps. I did it this week.

...Blogging is my happy place. Shout out to all y'allz.

...I always want to change my profile picture. I'm basically stuck in 2010. 

...I also want to keep instagramming at least once a day. Where is my proper insta etiquette?

...I hate touching the handle on toilettes because they carry a ton of germs.

...I watched the Goldbergs tuesday night and basically fell in love. I can relate so much!

Oh and I love me some old school Usher. Always and forever.

Celebrate We Will...

HAPPY JULY......whaaaaaaaat!?

"Turns out that not where but who your with really matters" 

Dave Matthews tailgate and concert. 

Great friends, great weather, great set list.

Nothin' else I need to say.

Besides the fact my feet are killing me from standing for so long!

What did you do this weekend?

                                                      

Tuesday Tunes

Freshman year. In frat basements. #Classy

Being in the car with my mom as a kid.

Things songs a bit weird, but it always relaxes me. My dad ALWAYS played this as a child, and I still love it. It makes me want to close my eyes and fall asleep.

JUST WHO DOESN'T LOVE THIS SONG. Single or not, you better be jammin'. Reminds me of summers with friends blasting it. Always always always.


Reminds me of happiness. The Lizzie McGuire Movie is my happy go-to movie!

beachin' it

Friday: Beached it. Ate icky fried beach food (always good at the moment, not so much after...). Ran into B on the beach. Yes, ran into. You'd think we'd be in touch but I went on a 6 mile walk and he saw me on the beach. (*screams YESSSSSS on the inside*)

Saturday: Put my DIY tote into good use. I love it! Also it totally matched my nails. and bathing suit. definitely feeling teal to be my summer color. Ended the night with Chinese food and photo shooting with the baby bro.

******

In other news...

I got my monogram pullover! 

I am reuniting with my 'birthday twin' from NY for a night at the shore. A little party never killed nobody

My bestie, is driving with her boyfriend from Boston to stay with me for the night and bought me tickets to Dave Matthews Band on saturday. SO excited.

M.I.A, and some favies of mine

psh. please don't tell me you've never heard anyone abbreviate some words to make them sound like a total girl (read: totes, legit, fabbyfab, ya get the point). Hi! After some roadblocks and by roadblocks I mean brain farts for blogging, and a busy week, I am ready to relax.

1. beach day: got so lucky! Didn't read past page 8, but it will become my summer read!

2. twins: what do you think? (we're not actually related...)

3. change: of hair color as usual. You can't tell but it has a super red tint to it which is odd because the box said dark brown. yooooooou liaaaaaar!

see what i've been checkin' out this past week:

-Miss USA for PETA. they're all just really great people, and I think if you don't appreciate animals, you need to look more into this and STOP wearing animals!

-Wanna go to Disney? Me too. 

-Old school Fall Out Boy. YEEEEES. cue my weird scene wanna be days

-Best vines. Wasted away a good hour watching these. Sadly, some of them are hilarious too!

-I've been eating cowtales (super yum) and craving some chocolate covered gummy bears (a must have)!

**

My butt will be glued to the couch for ever on sunday. Miss USA. 9PM. Be there. or be me, and wish you were there. 

Right Reasons

Finally caught up with The Bachelorette! Here's what I thought...

Brooks: Way cute date idea minus the cheesy-ness of sitting on the Hollywood sign. Totally would have loved a private concert from Andy Grammar. 

Ben: He played his cards right, for freakin' sure. I thought he was going to be a really sweet guy blah blah blah he had his little man come with him for the first time he stepped out of the limo. He causes drama by stealing Des away and all the guys have found mutual hatred for him. I was honestly disappointed he's a jerk. He reminds me of what will be the guy version of 'Tierra'.

Mikey T: I am suuuuuch a Mikey T fan. I don't know why. He seems sweet (for now) but  he seems like he genuinely cares. I'm fully rooting for the man

Bryden: I didn't think he had much of a personality at first but on his date with Des it seems like they really had hit it off. Except when he pulled out pictures from his accident. Literally LOL WHAT. Ya know its casual to carry those pics around on the daily.

But wait....what was the point of that music video????? Hi soulja boy.

The actual music video here

You were right

I cannot thank you enough for all of your comment telling me how amazing of a concert Luke Bryan & Florida Georgia Line were. You were right! I danced the night away, stomped my feet in the Georgia (jk) mud, and rolled my windows down and cruised! FGL & Luke were both amazing performers. Check out my time at Dirt Road Diaries tour:

(Being on the lawn means you get terrible pictures but a solid view)

(My DIY bow I made from a flag&hair tie!)

(During Muckalee Creek Water I went on my friends cousin's shoulders and it was the coolest thing ever. I had THE perfect view)

I even vined: vine.co/v/b3Wag3xUDYP  | vine.co/v/b3ZaaFghabr 

I was so upset that Thompson Square wasn't able to make it but hands down the best concert I've ever been to. Luke pulled a 5 year old boy on stage during Country Girl and it was the sweetest thing. He also saw the crowd holding signs for an 18 year old boy leaving in a month for the marines and he pulled him on stage and there was a huugeeee U.S.A chant. I had the chills!

**

Off to celebrate my one year! I figured out what we were doing early since his original plan was to take me to Hershey Park but it's supposed to rain around there so were checking out the Phillies game today...SO excited!